ichilanga mulilo

My Zambian brother Daniel is getting married this fall and in Zambia there are many traditions that must be followed before a couple gets married.

The steps involved in a Zambian wedding are:

• Meeting that special someone.
• Asking permission for the woman’s hand in marriage. This is done by the elderly members of the man’s family (usually an uncle, an aunt or a grandpa). Please note, you must bring money or the request will be denied.
• The woman is called to ensure that she knows the man who is asking for her hand in marriage; she has to acknowledge that she knows him and that she is willing to marry him.
• The dowry negotiations commence. Like the permission, the negotiations take place between the elderly members of the families. Cows or kwacha are acceptable forms of payment.
• Ichisekela busonge which is where the bride’s family brings food to the groom’s family to show that the bride’s family is happy that the groom chose their daughter.
• Ichilanga mulilo which is where the bride’s family brings their traditional food to the groom’s family and friends. It is a big party with singing, drumming and dancing with most everyone, but the bride in attendance.
• The kitchen party. Like a North American bridal shower, but with a Zambian spin.
• The wedding. (About time!)
• And finally the ukulula which is the formal introduction between the bride’s and groom’s families.
  
  

Daniel and some of his friends.

Saturday was the ichilanga mulilo for Daniel. The singing procession as the bride’s family entered our house was a sight to see as many ladies danced with containers of food on their heads.

Everyone assembled in the living room and there was dancing and singing to beat the band. And, of course being the only muzungu I was made to dance. . .literally I had no choice as I was pushed and pulled up into the centre of the crowd to shake my hips and dance for everyone. Except I am a muzungu and am incapable of moving my hips the way they can do here so everyone laughed at the my attempt at dancing. Good times. :)


After the singing, dancing and drumming was finished it was time to eat. The dining room table was full of traditional Zambian food. . .and other than nshima, kapenta and caterpillars, I’m not really sure what all the dishes were.